Gaw Kadal Massacre : "I lay motionless..."

By Sana Altaf

Again this year, Moisza did not celebrate her birthday. That day, January 22, once again brought back the memories of her maternal uncle, Rauf Ahmad, who laid down his life to save hundreds of people.

It was January 20, 1990, just a year after the Kashmiri insurgency against Indian occupation began. Faced with massive unrest as the insurgency swelled, the Indian government, unable to restore law and order, dismissed Kashmir's democratically elected National Conference government; the legislature and cabinet was dissolved and governor rule was declared. Indian bureaucrat Jagmohan Malhotra was appointed governor. That night, in response to militant attacks and the kidnapping of Rubaiya Sayeed - daughter of the former chief minister of Jammu and Kashmir, Mufti Sayeed - the Indian paramilitary Central Reserve Police Force (CRPF) conducted warrantless house-to-house searches, arresting hundreds of people, beating them and allegedly harassing women.

As word of the night searches spread, enraged mobs began to fill the streets. Unaware of the chaos, five-year-old Moisza (whose full name has been withheld at her request) kept busy with her birthday preparations while the valley simmered.

"It was January 21. The whole city was under curfew. People had gathered to protest against the incident. The protest had started from Raj Bagh [Srinagar], marching toward Lal Chowk and Maisuma [the city center]," remembers Farooq Ahmad Wani, one of the survivors of the Gawkadal massacre.

Farooq, then working as an engineer in the water works department, was heading for the Divisional Commissioner's (DC) office for curfew passes, but when he reached Jahangir Chowk of Srinagar, he was not allowed to move in the direction of the DC office.

"I was not allowed to go to the DC office, where I needed to get curfew passes. The security men directed me towards Lal Chowk. I started walking towards Lal Chowk, thinking of visiting my uncle, who lived nearby, on the other side of the Gawkadal bridge," said Farooq.

In the meantime, the peaceful protesters had passed by Moisza's uncle Rauf's house. As Zulehama, Rauf's elder sister recalls, "I had gone to my mother's place and started packing up Rauf's clothes for his journey to Jammu. He had just returned from his ski course in Gulmarg, so he was dressed in the jacket and sports shoes, which he wore even while he was martyred."

However, Rauf, then 24 years old, had promised his beloved niece Moisza that he would attend her birthday celebration before leaving for Jammu.

"My elder daughter Moisza would spend most of her time with Rauf and my mother. She was the apple of his eye. He had assured her he would attend her birthday on January 22," said Zulehama.

But watching the protesters from the window of his house made Rauf uneasy. Zulehama still remembers his words: "How can we tolerate disgrace of our women? If we stay quiet, they [security forces] will get up to anything. We all should join the protest, or it will be immodest on our part."

Rauf performed ablutions and joined the protesters. A mob of men, women and children marched chanting through the streets and lanes. Farooq, who was heading to his uncle's house, walked casually by the peaceful protesters, but when they reached the Gawkadal bridge in the heart of Srinagar City, Indian security forces opened fire on them.

"As the protesters reached the Gawkadal bridge, one gunshot was heard first, which was immediately followed by indiscriminate firing," recalls Farooq.

The fearful protesters scattered, and the firing continued as the CRPF chased them through lanes and alleys. Some of the protesters jumped into the Jhelum River. Those who could not escape were shot on the spot. Not a single person was spared.

"I had walked amid women thinking that they would not fire on them, but the CRPF men did not spare them either. Those who were injured were again shot in the head by the security personnel to make sure to kill them," recollects Farooq.

In this atmosphere of bloodshed and frenzy, the CRPF resorted to firing on the mob with machine guns. Zulehama sobs as she remembers what happened next. "Watching this, Rauf, who was a part of the protest, turned the machine gun towards himself. It pierced him deep with 32 bullets, saving scores of protesters while ending his life. As Rauf sacrificed his life for his nation and people, Moisza kept waiting for her darling uncle to celebrate her birthday."

As Rauf gave his life, Farooq struggled to live for his children. "I remembered my three daughters and thought of what would happen to them if I died," says Farooq. The girls were all toddlers at the time.

In an effort to save his own life, Farooq contemplated jumping from the bridge into the waters of the river Jhelum that flowed beneath it. But as he neared the edge of the bride to jump, a tall man came rushing at him, struck him and pinned him down to the ground before jumping into the water himself.

"I lay flat on the ground, scores of dead bodies around me. Not a single person was alive. I lay motionless to signal to them [the CRPF] that I was dead," Farooq said.

In the rush of the incident, a kangri, or heating pot, had crashed to the ground. Farooq's face lay on its hot ash as charcoal burned beside him. When he slowly turned his face to escape the heat, his motion caught the eye of a CRPF officer who quickly approached him.

"'He is alive,' an officer said aloud, abusing me in Hindi," remembers Farooq.

As the officer approached him, Farooq rose to his knees, his hands raised, pleading the officer not to harm him.

"Taking no sympathy on me, the officer shot the whole round of bullets into me with his carbine gun, knocking me down. I became half-unconscious, my body burning and feeling thirsty," recalls Farooq as his green crystal eyes dampen with tears.

After a while, Kashmir's local police arrived on the scene. As they surveyed the dead, they grew fierce with anger.

"I could see their faces red with sympathy for us and anger over the incident. Observing the anger of the police officials, one CRPF official slapped some of the local police personnel, asking them to leave or they will be shot, too," said Farooq. The policemen retreated.

Farooq again lost hope and lay back in pain when he was approached by a CPRF officer he assumed to be the subordinate of the one who shot him.

"He came toward me and saw that I was alive. He used abusive words and pointed his gun on my temple and began to press the trigger when the officer who had shot me before shouted from a distance, 'I have shot him enough. He will die on his own. Do not waste your bullet,'" remembers Farooq.

The official withdrew his gun and pushed Farooq to the ground. An eerie silence followed all around, which broke only when a truck landed to take the dead bodies. "A Sikh CRPF personnel stood near me, and I feebly pleaded with him to take me into the truck, as I was alive. He took hold of my muffler and dragged me into the truck along with other dead bodies," said Farooq.

The truck, filled with the dead, reached the police control room, where the corpses were unloaded. The control room doctor was called. The concerned physician examined them all.

"When the doctor saw me alive, he immediately ordered me to be taken to hospital, and I was rushed to hospital and saved," says Farooq, heaving a sigh.

Farooq remembers that besides him, a teenaged boy was also alive. The young man had taken a bullet in his knee and was crying fretfully in pain, but, upon reaching the control room, he ran away.

"The hospital was in chaos as all the dead were brought there. But on seeing me alive, people came to me, kissed me and hugged me. And amid all that, I noted a small boy holding my shoes close to his chest," smiles Farooq.

After two months of bed rest, Farooq recovered and returned to work. But the trauma stayed with him.

"I faced severe depression. I have been since taking antidepressants. When I work too much or think, I get tired. Doctors had even suggested that I relocate outside of Kashmir to overcome my condition. The incident has left a deep impact on my mind. Not a day passes when I don't think of that day," said Farooq.

The Gawkadal massacre left scores of people dead. While police say only 32 people were killed, eyewitnesses put the count at between 100 and 200 people. The most commonly used figure is 52. Since the incident has never been investigated, exact figures are still unknown.

Despite the clear evidence and eyewitness accounts, no known action was taken against any CRPF officials who ordered their forces to open fire at Gawkadal, or against the officers present during the shooting. No public inquiry was ordered into the incident. The police did file complaints against demonstrators who pelted stones at security forces, but even these were not investigated. Without an investigation into the events at Gawkadal, there will be no chance of holding those responsible accountable.

The Gawkadal massacre is regarded as the bloodiest massacre to date in the history of Kashmir. Human rights activists here see the incident as a turning point in the history of Kashmir, and define the killings as the primary catalyst for the mass militant movement. As Human Rights Watch said in a May 1991 report, "In the weeks that followed as security forces fired on crowds of marchers and as militants intensified their attacks against the police and those suspected of aiding them, Kashmir's civil war began in earnest."

"Gawkadal massacre changed the mindset of the people of Kashmir towards India. In that protest, only 10,000 people participated, but it followed mass protests in which hundreds thousands of people thronged to the streets," said Khurram Parvez, an award-winning Kashmiri human rights activist and cofounder of Jammu and Kashmir Coalition of Civil Society.

Khurram said the Gawkadal massacre "pushed people to join militancy and receive training." Khurram's maternal grandfather was killed in the violence that day.

"I was 14 years of age then, and the man behind that massacre lived next door. It was a torture to see him every day. As a young boy, I had decided to take revenge on him, but then, as I grew up, I realized that the greatest revenge would be fighting for justice," says Khurram.

Twenty-one years later, the situation in Kashmir remains unchanged. The security forces' killings of innocents have not ceased, nor has the government's indifference towards such incidents. On January 8, 2010, 16-year-old Inayat Ahmad was killed in a shooting by Indian security forces. Ahmad's killing was followed by the death of 13-year-old Wamiq Farooq, who was hit in the head by a tear gas shell. Death came to 16-year-old Zahid Farooq after he was allegedly shot by security forces, having done nothing to provoke them, while playing cricket on February 5, 2010.

The cycle of killings continued and took an even more violent turn following the killing of 16-year-old Tufail Ahmad Mattoo, who was allegedly hit in the head by a tear gas shell as he was returning home from his tuitions. Tufail's death triggered valley-wide mass protests. Security forces used tear gas, gunfire and pellet guns against the protesters, some of whom observed total nonviolence, while others pelted the security forces with stones. The unrest seized Kashmir for six long months, which were dominated by stringent curfews and resulted in the killing of 112 civilians. Even the funeral processions of the deceased were fired upon.

Shares Irfan Mattoo, Tufail's uncle, said, "They [security forces] thwarted Tufail's funeral procession by using force against mourners. I and many of our relatives, including Tufail's father, could not participate in the last rites due to unwarranted restrictions."

Seventeen-year-old Javaid Ahmad was killed when security forces fired on the funeral procession of another teenager, Mohammad Rafiq.

Despite wide condemnation from human rights organizations and activists, the state government has ordered probes into only 17 of the 112 killings.

As an August 18, 2010, press statement by the Indian human rights organization People's Union for Civil Liberties states: "Repression is bound to further alienate the people and lead to more unrest. The PUCL strongly condemns the continuing killing of unarmed protesters by police firing in the Kashmir valley even if a few from the crowd might have pelted stones at the police or the security forces. The policy of bullets for brickbats followed throughout the country is inhuman even under a dictatorship and is totally unacceptable in a democracy."

The statement adds, "had the state government policy been to punish the guilty policemen or members of the security forces perpetuating these crimes instead of protecting them by subverting the course of justice, people in such a large number would not have risen in the unarmed revolt to which we are a witness today."

Seeking an end to the human rights violations in Kashmir, Delhi-based independent human rights observer and writer Professor Badri Raina said: "I believe human rights violations can diminish, perhaps cease, only if and when an Egypt-like, nonviolent, secular, mass movement is forged and allowed to sustain itself by all sides to the conflict. By 'all sides,' I do mean the state agencies, the local militants, the infiltrating Jihadis, the Hindutva hotheads and all those who make money from mayhem."

Originally appeared in http://www.truth-out.org

How I Became a Stone-Pelter...

I am from downtown Srinagar born in 1991. I was admitted to one of the best school of valley. As a child I had dream to become engineer. Whenever somebody used to ask me about my aim I would proudly say engineer. As I started to grow up I started to become familiar with many words which everyone used to talk about that among them few were "azadi" (freedom), "hartal" (shutdown) but I was unable to understand the meaning of these words. I loved the word hartal as it was holiday, so I always wished for hartal. As I grew up I came to know about mujahids. I used to listen to the stories of mujahids. I would often ask my elders to tell me about mujahids. They told me stories of many mujahids like Isaaq, Ishfaq, and Jan Malik which I liked to share with my friends. 

Even I was named after a Shaheed Mujahid (martyr fighter) who was killed before few weeks I was born. Then Came the summer of 2007, I was passing by Nowhatta, It was month of Muharram. There was heavy stone pelting going on. I found it very interesting. I saw youth pelting stones and shouting freedom slogans. Initially I was afraid to go in front and pelt stones on Police and CRPF.

I used to think they are some angels fighting on the front. Days passed. Now I too had gathered guts to pelt stones on the front line. It was now 2008 I was busy with my exams. I heard about Amarnath Land Row. Things started changing very fast I had never seen kind of hartals (shutdowns) before. I had never seen kind of stone pelting before. It was totally new experience to me.

Now tear gas shell wasn't shot anymore, now bullets were fired directly. I saw many boys hit by a bullet and dying on spot. I was disturbed by this. I asked my grandfather once why they directly shoot on us. His answer was "Tse chuk mangaan azadi" (You are asking for freedom). This answer changed my mind. I started realizing neither we are part of India nor India considers us their part.

Now I started reading history about our freedom struggle. I came to know about many things about the Kashmir struggle. Now I started reading newspaper, magazines very keenly. I started observing everything about the political system. I wept when I read about Gawkadal, Zukura, Hawal, Bijbihara, Sopore, Kupwara massacres. I too wanted to become Mujahid.
I once joked with my mother that I will become Mujahid, her answer was pain full, first give me poison then you will become Mujahid.
Came 2009 I again started to remain busy with my studies but whenever there was stone pelting in Nowahatta I used go there and pelt stones. Stone pelting for me now, has become a reaction to the atrocities and d illegal occupation of India. I do it for a cause.

I was once caught by police and was put in custody I was also beaten but that also couldn't break me. When I was released I again started pelting stones. A policemen in custody told me why you pelt stones, do you think you will get freedom by pelting stones. If it is the case I am also ready to pelt stones, he said.
But still it is the only thing which makes me feel that gun or bullet cannot suppress my thoughts my sentiments and to live in occupied I want to be free....

I am happy when I pelt stones because I want to take revenge for every innocent killing. I know my stone wont harm them but remember it is not stone it is my feelings. I pelt stones because we are oppressed.

It was June 2009 Shopian rape had occurred. It was unbearable to hear rape and murder case of a girl and her sister in law. Tears rolled from my eyes when I read story of Asiya in newspaper. Once again hartals, stone pelting emerged with more boys felling to bullets to a response for protesting for justice from brutal Indian military.

I watched a press conference of Omar Abdullah on news channel promising to bring culprits in front of people and punish them in 24 hors. Honestly I was happy with his promise I saw a hope in him in bringing justice to the duo.
But nothing happened instead of justice their relatives were beaten. This made me more aggressive I wanted to take revenge, I wanted to punish murderers. More ever I considered cm for all this because his behaviour made me much aggressive much angry against India and their brutality here.

After one month of continuous strikes life was back on track. Again we started to remain busy with our studies.
But I always used to think why didn’t the duo got justice I once had seen news of a 14 year old girl from Delhi who was killed by unknown person in her bedroom. But Police wasn’t able to solve the case. It was then handed over to CBI who arrested the culprits in few weeks.

But in case of Kashmir CBI solved the case differently they didn’t arrested the culprits but made a funny story of the victims that they died due to drowning in stream whose depth was hardly unto knees. This clearly showed policy of India in Kashmir.

But whom could I ask these questions why didn’t they get justice? Why they shoot us if we protest for seeking justice? These questions always were in my mind. By pelting stones I dint got answer but I was happy I felt I am taking revenge by pelting stones but what else I could do who was their to listen me. I felt satisfaction by pelting stones by pelting stones I wanted to say them give us justice leave our Kashmir let us leave in peace let us live in place where no mother has fear that her son may return dead. These are not stones these are my feelings.

Came 2010 it was January once I saw Wamiq Farooq, He was a neighbour of one of my relatives residing at Rainawari area of Srinagar. Wamiq was very good boy he used to offer my times prayers. He used to call me bhai (brother).
After few weeks on one Friday evening I heard that a boy has been martyred after hitting by tear gas shell but I didn’t know unfortunately it was Wamiq the same guy whom I had seen before a day. When I woke up next morning I saw a picture of boy whose identity was yet to be revealed in newspaper. After few minutes I got call from my cousin that Wamiq has been martyred. For few minutes I totally froze I wasn’t able to speak. A boy hardly 13 was no more. You can understand how it feels when you hear death of person whom you know.

Wamiq was like my little brother I had never thought an innocent young boy will fell prey to their brutality. Once again hartals (strikes) and stone pelting emerged with more boys getting injured and martyred. Indian occupational forces were responding with more brutality, they are occupational forces their cruelty and brutality is not a surprise to us but I was surprised by the role of Jammu and Kashmir police our local police they are playing absurd role. One fails to understand the cause of their cruelty and brutality, Is it they want to show more loyalty to India or they are killing their brothers for money. What ever the reason is but the way they behave with their own countrymen is painful. Maybe they have became blind because of power government has given to them.

Wamiq's death gave birth to a powerful revolution. The revolution shook the existence of Indian rule in Kashmir. Now India started to show their military power to unarmed civilians. The way they deal with protests is answer to those people who call India integral part of Kashmir.

India has started to engage its every front to curb this revolution from politically to technically even media is being used to curb this revolution.
Streets of Kashmir have become red with the blood of innocent people. Jhelum has become red with blood of innocent people.

I know one day may be I will also fell to their bullets even I am mentally prepared for that because I have attained extreme limit of stone pelting. But remember my death will give birth to hundreds of kale kharab (hotheads). As I became kale kharab (hothead) after death of innocent boys from last three years. 65 deaths have already given birth to hundreds of kale kharab (hot head) who are ready to fight till their last breath. These kale kharab (hothead) are present at every corner of Kashmir. What ever will the future of present intifada but the struggle to free Kashmir will continue even if takes 100 more years. Next generation will produce more dangerous kale kharabs (hot heads) to free Kashmir.

The Author is Anonymous

Adil Ramzan Sheikh was Dragged and Killed

In a summer that saw 100 people dead in an equal number of days, more than 2000 injured, inhumane restrictions on movement of people, and a gagged media, many stories went unreported. Like that of Adil Ramazan Sheikh, a teenager hailing from Palhalan Pattan, who was allegedly pulled out from a hospital bed and executed at the hospital gates.

In the myriad tragedies that hit Kashmir this year, Adil’s killing was just one. Just one of 125. Despite the fact that the circumstances of his death stood out, his story was lost in the heap of events. Rather than becoming the biggest story of the year, it remained an under reported one. No investigation was convened to look into the circumstances of his killing.

On July 30, the volatile Pattan town heated up, with the news of two people having been killed in police firing earlier in the day in Sopore. Protestors gathered on the highway after Friday prayers and engaged police and paramilitary in stone pelting clashes. Thirteen-year-old Adil could hear the sound of teargas and gunfire at his home in Palhalan, some two kilometers from the spot.

Adil’s father Muhammad Ramazan Sheikh still remembers the sequence of events that followed.

“We were at home, when we heard the gunfire and teargas at around 3pm. We came to know that demonstrations are going on at Pattan market. Many people from the village rushed to join in,” says Sheikh who also rushed toward the spot along with his son.

The duo and other people from the village were stopped at the highway, a mile short of the hotspot.

“As people from this side were stopped at the junction, they began to raise slogans there. Adil was with me. After a while, he and a few kids, taking the advantage of their age, sneaked through the police barrier to join the protestors in the market,” Sheikh said.

Sheikh returned home after some time. At 5.30 pm, he received a call on his cell phone.

“It was a doctor calling from Hospital (Sub District Hospital Pattan). He told me that my son is injured and that I should come to hospital,” Sheikh recalls.
Sheikh rushes towards the highway again. By now, he finds that posse of paramilitary at the junction has gained strength. He is not allowed to move towards hospital. He waits.

What Sheikh comes to know later, is that after reaching the market, Adil and his friends had apparently been jeering at some paramilitary men.

Adil is fired upon and falls injured. His friends try to pick him up but they are chased away.

“They (friends) had not been able to pick him up themselves, so they requested some women standing there to get Adil towards them. The women did, and Adil was taken to the hospital,” said Sheikh.

The Sub District Hospital Pattan is just a few paces from the main market. It has two gates, one on front side the other on back side. The two gates open into two different alleys, both of which lead to the highway at Pattan market.

The clashes in the town that day saw the hospital getting flooded with injured, as well as with people trying to save themselves the wrath of troopers.

Around 6pm Sheikh was still at the crowded junction, hoping to find a way to reach the hospital. He gets another call.

“It was the doctor again. He told me that CRPF had raided the hospital and were beating everybody there. They (staff) were hiding, he told me,” said Sheikh.

The caller, whom Sheikh doesn’t want to name, tells him that he doesn’t know about the status of his son, for now. Sheikh grows impatient, but cannot break through the police cordon. He waits. A few minutes later he gets another call from the same doctor.

“They have fired on him again. He is dead.” Sheikh is told this time.

A shattered Sheikh is still unable to make it to the hospital, though his priority has changed from seeing his injured son to bringing his body home. After repeated unsuccessful attempts to make it to hospital, he returns home, now waiting for friends and neighbours at the hospital to bring the body home.

There are barely any records of the tumultuous events of the day at the Pattan Hospital. BMO Pattan denied that anyone had been killed in the hospital. But he admitted that paramilitary CRPF raided that hospital that day, beat up patients, attendants, and even some staff. Asked if they had filed any complaint with the police, he replied in negative.

“I only report to my CMO,” he added.

But, despite official denials, almost everybody in the hospital knows the story.

Wishing anonymity, the staff told Kashmir Life that CRPF ran amok in the hospital beating anybody who came in the way.

“They manhandled a female nurse, beat up injured patients, removed their intravenous drips, and pulled off Adil Ramazan from his bed over there,” said a doctor pointing to a far end corner bed in the ward. Adil, he said, had a leg injury, when he was first brought to the hospital.

“After pulling him from his bed, they (CRPF) took him along. He was then fired outside the hospital gate,” he said. In the street, outside the gates, where Adil was killed, a number of protestors convened and brought Adil back to the hospital.

“This time he had been shot in the chest. He was dead already,” the doctor said.

Hospital records, however, do not mention the whole sequence. There is no record of Adil’s admission the first time. It only records him as being admitted with a fatal chest injury, which killed him. There is an error with the date too, in the records, which mention 31 June instead of 30.

A hospital source explained that when the injured boys were being brought to the hospital in the first place, they insisted on getting medical attention without admission slips.

Sheikh and his family had to wait longer for Adil’s body. Many people had assembled at the hospital and were trying to take the body to his home in Palhalan. Witnesses said they were not allowed to move on the main road. After some unsuccessful attempts the protestors took out Adil’s body on a hospital bed, and carried it on their shoulders. They then waded through the rice fields, walking more than six kilometers carrying the body and reached Sheikh’s home by midnight.

The next day newspaper reports, some of which didn’t get his name right said he was killed during clashes in Pattan.

Sheikh says he has never visited the hospital since, not even to get the records, nor has hopes of a police investigation. A fact finding independent team of Indian civil society has demanded an investigation into the circumstances of Adil’s killing. The team comprised of academic Bela Bhatia, advocate Vrinda Grover, journalist Sukumar Muralidharan and activist Ravi Hemadri of The Other Media, described the attack on hospital as a violation of International Humanitarian Law.

“Whatever the truth about the events that led to Adil’s death, there is little question that Pattan hospital on July 30 suffered an attack which by all acknowledged covenants, puts the CRPF and all other elements party to it, under the cloud of a serious crime. This constitutes a clear violation of International Humanitarian Law, and calls for an urgent and impartial investigation”: the team report (KASHMIR LIFE)

and we know what happens to these investigations and probes.

Heart Crushing Documentary of Kashmir 2010

I don't have words to describe what they say for my heart is bleeding...

PART ONE: ANANTNAG (ISLAMABAD)






PART TWO : SRINAGAR

Shed a Tear: A Tribute to The Martyrs of 2010

"Nobody who enters Paradise will (ever like to) return to this world even if he were offered everything on the surface of the earth (as an inducement) except the martyr who will desire to return to this world and be killed ten times for the sake of the great honour that has been bestowed upon him." (Sahih Muslim)

Kashmir Martyrs 2010

1. 8^th of January, 2010, 16 year old Inayat Ahmad of Dalgate Srinagar was killed in CRPF firing at Budshah Chowk.
2. 31^st of Feb,2010,Wamiq Farooq, 13, of Rainawari Srinagar was killed when a teargas shell fired by police hits him on his head
3. Tufail Ashraf Mattoo, 17, of Saida Kadal killed by police tear gas canister at Gani stadium Rajouri Kadal on June 11.
4. Muhammad Rafiq Bangroo, 24, of Dana Mazar Safa Kadal beaten by CRPF on June 12 near his residence. He succumbed to injuries on June 20.
   
5. Javed Ahmed Malla, 19, of Palpora Noorbagh killed by CRPF or police on June 20 at Waniyar Srinagar.
   
6. Aziz Malik of Chuntwari, Machill Kupwara, killed by armed forces on June 20 at Machill sector of LoC.
   
7. Mazloom Malik of Chuntwari Kupwara, killed by armed forces on June 20 at Machill sector of LoC.
   
8. Firdous Ahmed Kakroo, 16 of Niglee Sopore, Baramulla killed by CRPF on June 25 near Jamia Qadeem in Sopore.
   
9. Shakeel Ahmed Ganai, 24 of Lalad Sopore killed by 177 batallion of CRPF at Chankhan Sopore.
   
10. Bilal Ahmed Wani, 22, of Kraltaeng Sopore, killed by CRPF bullet in Kraltaeng on June 27.
    
11. Tajamul Bashir Bhat, 17, of Wadoora Sopore, killed by CRPF or SOG at Kapra Cinema in Sopore outside headquaters of 92 battalion of CRPF.
    
12. Tauqeer (Asif) Ahmed Rather, 09, of Rather Muhalla of Delina, Baramullah, killed by CRPF on June 28.
    
13. .Ishtiyaq Ahmed Khanday, 15, of SK Colony, Islamabad, killed by police on June 29.
    
14. .Imtiyaz Ahmed Ittoo, 17, of Watergam Dailgam Islamabad, killed by police in SK Colony Islamabad on June 29.
    
15. Shuja'at ul Islam, 17 of Anchidora Islamabad, killed by police at SK Colony Islamabad on June 29.
    
16. Muzaffar Ahmed Bhat, 17, of Gangbug, Batamaloo, and body recovered from Doodh Ganga Nallah in Baramullah on June 06 alegedly arrested by CRPF on July 05 and tortured to death.
    
17. Fayaz Ahmed Wani, 24, of Gangbug Batamaloo, killed by CRPF or police firing at Batamaloo on July 06
    
18. Yasmeen Jan, 25, of Lashmanpora Danderkha, Batamaloo, killed by CRPF/police firing at her residence in Danderkhah on July 06.
    
19. Abrar Ahmed Khan, 16 of Maisuma Bund killed alegedly by police CRPF firing at Maisuma on July 06.
    
20. Faizaan Ahmed Bhuhroo, 13, of Jalal Sahib Baramulla, died by drowning after SOG men were trying to arrest him on July 17.
    
21. Fayaz Ahmed Khanday, 23, of Binner Baramulla, killed by CRPF in Baramulla.
    
22. Tariq Ahmed Dar, 17 of Panzala, Rafiabad, Baramulla, killed in police custody on July 25.
    
23. Muhammad Ahsan Ganai, 45 of Amargarh Sopore killed by CRPF at Krankshivan Colony on July 30.
    
24. Showkat Ahmed Chopan, 17, of Amargarh Sopore killed at Kranshivan Colony on Juky 30.
    
25. Adil Ramzaan Sheikh, 13 of Pattan killed by CRPF at Pattan on july 30.
    
26. Nazir Ahmed Mir, 23, of Sheeri Baramulla killed by CRPF at Pattan on July 30.
    
27. Javid Ahmed Teli, 20, of Bungalbagh Baramulla, killed by SOG at Cement Bridge Baramulla on July 31.
    
28. Mudassir Ahmed Lone, 17, of Herpora Naidkhai, Sumbal killed by CRPF/police at IRP camp in Naidkhai on July 31.
    
29. Nayeem Ahmed Shah, 20 of Pampore killed by CRPF at Pampore on August 01
    
30. Rayees Ahmed Wani, 18 of pampore killed by CRPF at Pampore on August 01.
    
31. Afrooza Teli of Khrew of Pampore killed by CRPF at her residence on August 01.
    
32. Javed Ahmed Sheikh, 18 of Wuyen Pampore killed in blast in police station at Khrew on August 01.
    
33. Muhammad Amin Lone, 22 of Shalnag Khrew killed in blast in police station at Krew on August 01.
    
34. Basharat Ahmed Reshi, 14 of Wachi Sangam killed by police near his residence on August 02.
    
35. Irshad Ahmed Bhat, 17 of Reshipora, Sangam tortured and killed alegedly by CRPF and police on August 02.
    
36. Ashiq Hussain Bhat, 15, of Kulgam Islamabad killed by CRPF at Chawalgam on August 02.
    
37. Rameez Ahmed Bhat, 16, of Kulgam killed by CRPF at Kulgam on August 02.
    
38. Hafiz Muhammad Yaqoob Bhat, 22 of Zadoora Kakapora Pulwama killed by CRPF at Kakpora on August 02.
39. Tariq Ahmed Dar, 17 of Semthan Bijbehara wounded by CRPF on August 01 and succumbed to injuries on August 02.
    
40. Khursheed Ahmed War, 27, of Shumnag Kralpora Kupwara killed by CRPF at Khuzunmati bridge near Kralpora on August 02.
    
41. Sameer Ahmed Rah, 09 of Batamaloo Srinagar killed by CRPF at Batamaloo on August 02.
    
42. Mehraj ud din Lone, 23 of Barthana Qamarwai killed by CRPF at Qamarwari police station on August 03.
    
43. Anis Ahmed Ganai, 17, of Dangerpora Narwara killed by CRPF at Eidgah on August 03.
    
44. Suhail Ahmed Dar, 15, of Zainakote Srinagar killed by CRPF at Parimpora on August 03.
    
45. Jehangir Ahmed Bhat, 23, of Chenigam Yaripora killed by CRPF at Kulgam on August 03.
    
46. Riyaz Ahmed Bhat, 25 of Khrew injured by CRPF at Khrew on August succumbed to injuries on August 03.
    
47. Muhammad Yaqoob Bhat, 20 of Nund Reshi Colony Bemina, killed by CRPF at Bemina on August 04.
    
48. Muhammad Iqbal Khan, 22 of Lone Muhalla Chanapora injured by CRPF on July 30 at Chanapora succumbed to injuries on August 04.
    
49. Shabir Ahmed Malik, 30 of Lonepora Newa Pulwama, killed by CRPF at Pulwama on August 04.
    
50. Ghulam Nabi Badyari, 48 of Ganpatyar, Habba Kadal, killed by CRPF at his residence on August 05.
    
51. Rameez Ahmed, 22, of Mundji Sopore killed by CRPF at Warpora on August 06.
    
52. Aisha Sheikh of Ganpatyar Habba Kadal succumbed to sling shot injury at her residence on August 07.
    
53. Fida Nabi Lone, 20, of Qamarwari, injured in CRPF action at Qamarwari on August 03 and succumbed to injuries on August 08.
    
54. Farrukh Bukhari, 19, of Kreeri Pattan whose body was found at Kreeri on August 11 after 13 days of his disappearance.
    
55. Mudasir Ahmad Zargar, 16, of Trehgam Kupwara, killed in police and CRPF firing on August 13.
    
56. Ali Mohammad Khanday, 60, of Khanday Mohalla Pattan, killed in police and CRPF firing on August 13.
    
57. Arif Mir, 19, of Lagropora, Sopore killed in CRPF firing on August 13.
    
58. Sameer Lone, 18, of Lagropora, Sopore killed in CRPF firing on August 13
    
59. Irshad Ahmad Latoo, 35, of S K Colony Islamabad killed by police and paramilitary CRPF troopers on 14th August
    
60. Umar Ahmad Dar, 16, of Narbal Srinagar killed by CRPF on 14th August
    
61. Muhammad Abbas Dhobi, 30, of Mattan Islamabad beaten up by police and CRPF succumbed on 17th August.
    
62. Milat Ahmad Dar An eight-year-old boy of Harnag , Islambad, injured and later succumbed on 19th August. He was critically injured by paramilitary forces while playing in a field.
    
63. Mudasir Ahmed Hajam, 19, Sopore, sustained bullet injury on 19th Aug by CRPF and succumbed on 20th August morning.
    
64. Nazir Ahmed Sheikh, 25, Bijbehara in South Kashmir’s Islamabad district. Fired by CRPF on 20th August died on way to hospital.
    
65. Bilal Ahmad Sheikh, 22 year old, succumbed to his injuries on 23rd Aug was seriously injured on 14 August. A resident of Singhpora Pattan.
    
66. Omar Qayooom Bhat, 17 year old. Of Anchar Soura. Ruthlessly beaten by paramilitary CRPF troopers and police on 20th August. Admitted in Hospital on 23rd August after his release and Succumbed on 25th August.
    
67. Irshad Ahmad Parray, 11, Old Eidgah Islamabad, sustained pellet injuries in his vital organs and succumbed on his way to hospital on August 30.
    
68. Feroz Ahmad Malik, 17, Palhalan Pattan, fired by cops on 6th September and brought dead to sub
    
69. Mudasir Ahmad Mir, 23, Ussan Pattan, fired by cops on 6th september scummbed to his injuries on way
    
70. Noorudin Tantray, 26, Tantrypora Pattan, fired by cops on 6th september and scummbed to his injuries on way to hospital.
    
71. Muhammad Ramzan Mir, 45, Ussan Pattan, fired by cops on 6th september and scummbed to his injuries on way to hospital. It was fourth killing on 6th September.
    
72. Imran Ahmad Dar, 25, Zadibal, crtically injured by CRPF on 2nd Septemeber scummbed on 8th Septemeber at Soura Hospital.
    
73. Ghulam Muhammad Guroo, 55, maloora Khujibagh Sumbal, received head injury in clashes on 8th September and scummbed on 9th Septemeber at Soura hospital.
    
74. Muhammad Ashraf Mir,34, Palhallan Pattan, Sustained critical injuries in neck in indiscriminate firing by police on 6th September and scummbbed to his injuries at Soura hospital on 12th September.
    
75. Nisar Ahmad Bhat, Ajas Bandipora, fired upon by Border Security Force (BSF) killing him onspot on 13th September.
    
76. Nisar Ahmad Kuchay,22, Humhama , Fired upon by police injuring him critically. Taken to Soura hospital where he succumbs after few hours on 13th September.
    
77. Ghulam Rasool Tantray, 50, sustained bullet injuries at Humhama on 13th September sccumbs on the same day at Soura hospital.
    
78. Danish Nabi, 13, Charar-i-Sharief, was killed in CRPF firing near Hanwari near Char town on Sep 13. He was a seventh class student.
    
79. Mudasir Ahmad Parray, Kreshama Tangmarg, Killed in Police and CRPF firing on Sep 13.
    
80. Tariq Ahmad Ganai, Tillegam Tangmarg, Killed in Police and CRPF firing on Sep 13.
    
81. Abdul Majid Kuzzar, Bonegam Kunzer, killed in Police and CRPF firing on Sep 13 in Tangmarg north Kashmir.
    
82. Iqbal Ahmad Malik, Tumberhama Tangmarg, Killed when CRPF and Police opened fire on people on Sep 13.
    
83. Abdul Qayoom Wani, Waniloo Tangmarg, Killed in Police and CRPF firing on Sep 13.
    
84. Afaq Ahmad Khan, Iqbal Colony Tangmarg, Killed in Police and CRPF firing on Sep 13.
    
85. Javaid Ahmad Rather, 24, Kadalbal Pampore, Killed in Police and CRPF firing on Sep 13.
    
86. Ajaz Ahmad Wagay, 26, Kadalbal Pampore, Killed in Police and CRPF firing on Sep 13.
    
87. Riyaz Ahmad Sheikh, 28, Tengan pampore, Killed in Police and CRPF firing on sep 13.
    
88. Javaid Ahmad Teli, Humhama, Killed by troopers and Polce firing on Sep 13.
    
89. Rafiqa Bano, (Female), Ompora Budgam, Killed when CRPF and Polce opened fire in Budgam to disperse protestors on Sep 13.
    
90. Showkat Ahmad Mir, Budgam, was district president of JKLF (R), killed by CRPF and Police firing when he was leading a procession in main Budgam town on Sep 13.
    
91. Aqib Ahmad wagay, 14, Islamabad, Killed by CRPF and Polce men at Sarnal Islamabad outside the house of NC MP Mehboob Beigh in an unprovoked firing on Sep 13.
    
92. Muhammad Rafiq Teli, Chanikhan Sopore, Killed in CRPF firing on Sep 13.
    
93. Adil Ahmad, Humhama, Sccumbed to his injuries at SMHS hospital on Sep 13. It was a bloody monday (Sep 13) in which more than 17 people were killed in a single day with many crtical and many missing.
    
94. Abdul Qayoom, Sangrama, injured in CRPF and police firing at Tangmarg on Sep 13 and sccumbed to his injuries on morning of 14th September.
    
95. Arshad Khan, Arari Mendhar Poonch, killed when Policemen led by local SDPO opned fire on students protesting against desceration of Quran in US and in Soldarity with Kashmir on Sep 15.
    
96. Baghdad Hussain Shah, Gulad Mendhar Poonch, Killed in Police firing at Mendhar Poonch on Sep 15.
    
97. Shameem Ahmad, Jagil Mendhar Poonch, Killed in Police firing in the frontier district on Poonch on Sep 15.
    
98. Alamdar Shah, Gulad Mendhar, killed in CRPF police firing in poonch district on Sep 15. It was fourth killing on a single day in Poonch
    
99. Mudasir Ahmad Kana, 20, Batapora Sopore, killed when CRPF opned fire on protestors in Sopore. Received bullet injury and died on way to hospital on Sep15.
    
100. Hajira, 55, Redwani Kulgam, died of heart attack after CRPF ransacked her house. She was taken to hospital but was decleared brought dead by doctors.
     
101. Yasir Hameed Sheikh, Maisuma Srinagar, injured in police firing on August 30 succumbed on Sep 16.
     
102. Fayaz Ahmad Dar, 22, Surpura Beeru in Budgam, Killed when Army's 2 RR opened fire on group of people. He got seriously injured and was taken to hospital where he succumbed on Sep 17.
     
103. Ghulam Rasool Bhat, Tapper Pattan, Killed when Indian forces opned fire at protestors killing him and injuring many others on Sep 17.
     
104. Imtiyaz Ahmad, 23, Pallipora Shopian, Killed when Indian forces resorted to indiscriminate firing him and injuring six others on Sep 17.
     
105. Raju Nath, 14, Nathpora Khanbal, he had jumped into the river Jehlum after being chased away by Indian forces. His body was fished later on Sep 18.
     
106. Fayaz Ahmad Naikoo, Bemina Srinagar, injured on Sep14 in forces and police firing and Succumbed to his injuries at Soura hospital on Sep 18.
     
107. Noor-ul-Amin Dagga, 30, Naibasti Islamabad, Killed when CRPF and Police opened fire on funeral procession of Raju Nath, 14 year old boy. Noor-ul-Amin died on way to hospital on Sep 18.
     
108. Insar Ahmad Tantray, 27, Palhalan Pattan, Killed when Indian forces opened fire on people, he received bullet in chest and died on way to hospital on Sep 18. He was a student of Kashmir University doing Masters in English.
     
109. Ali Muhammad Waza, 30, Tantray Mohalla Pattan, Killed when Indian forces opened fire on people. He received critical injuries and succumbed in hospital after few hours on Sep 18.
     
110. Muhammad Amin Ganai, 25, Tappar Pattan, has sustained firearm arm injury to his spine when police opened fire on protestors at Tappar Payeen on Sep 17. he succumbed to his injuries on Sep 19 at Soura hospital.
     
111. Shabir Ahmad Dar, 25, Lider-mund Pulwama, sustained firearm injuries to his abdomen on Sep 13 when forces opened fire on people. He succumbed on Sep 19 at Soura hospital.
     
112. Bilal Ahmad Najar, Khanabal Islamabad, injured on Sep 18 in forces firing. He succumbed to his injuries on Sep 19 at SMHS hospital.
     
113. Mubeena Akhtar, 30, Natipora Sopore, sustained firearm injury in abdomen when patrol party of forces opened fire on pedestrians. She was taken to sopore hospital and referred to SMHS hospital srinagar were she was decleared brought dead on Sep 19
     
114. Altaf Ahmad, 25, Matipora Islamabad, beaten by army and got severely injured and was rushed to hospital and succumbed on Sep 20 after battling with life for three days.
     
115. Sajad Ahmad Pandit, 25, Sheikhpora Humhama, was seriously injured on Sep 13 at Humhama when CRPF and police opened fire to quell pro-freedom demonstration. He succumbed to his injuries at Soura hospital on Sep 22.
     
116. Umar Sulaiman Bhat, 16, Puthka Sopore, had received firearm injury in thigh when Indian troops belonging to Rashtriya Rifles (RR) firied on him on September 16. He succumbed to his injuries at Soura hospital on October 02.
     
117. Ghulam Nabi Mir, 55, Kadalabal Pampore, injured in Police (SOG) Special Operation Group and CRPF beating on October 07 resulting into severe head injuries, was taken into Soura hospital where he succumbed to his injuries on October 15.
118. 14-year-old Arif Ahmad Bhat, son of Javed Ahmad Bhat of Chinkral Mohalla in uptown here had sustained critical injuries when a police teargas shell hit him on the head during clashes between protesters and police in Srinagar’s Maisuma locality on October, 25, 2009. He was rushed to SK Institute of Medical Sciences, Soura where he remained in coma for 8 months. He breathed his last on November 12.

I remember them, Do You? I remember there mothers whose heart must be aching for their presence, I remember their Fathers who still can feel the weight of the coffin in which he carried his son.I remember the tears of my sisters who long to play and tease them again. I remember my brothers who still can't get the picture of losing your best friend and companion. I feel what his mother must be feeling when she sees his mattresses, I feel what his father has lost, the sight of his joy playing around the house, I feel it all..My heart wails and my tear drops onto my hands. That tear just flashes the pictures of these innocent faces and their broken families.. They must be looking towards us from the heavens,smiling- wanting to be back and die for their rights,fight the tyranny and the oppression once again. I miss you with tears. I Love You.. I stand up, close my eyes and look inside to find your faces glowing and smiling towards me. I take my hand up and salute your courage! and just break down on the earth crying and wailing. But Sameer the 9 year old baby whispers into my ears "You have to Fight for us,for my mother, Don't lose heart. Azadi will come to Kashmir,you just be strong and patient. Fight the tyrants off". I just fall into a trance while i can see them playing in the garden of the heaven. Freedom will come to Kashmir. We Will Not Fall, We Will Rise Again.

"Neither the flesh nor the blood of your sacrifices reaches Allah, but it is the righteous motive underlying them that reaches Him." (Quran 22:37)

"Don't die so soon my son....Oh my beloved son – won’t you miss me,’’

When the boys carry the stretcher through the narrow swampy street, there is rage even in their steps. Suddenly the slogans sound like rhythmic wails. A child watches from a window as an elderly woman holds him tight and then showers almonds and sweets. Few fall on the body, wrapped in a colourful blanket.

It is already dark and the mourners try to find their way, guided by the light of their cell phone torches. Fida Nabi (17) is returning home one last time and his funeral procession is like a volcano of anger, a little confrontation with the security men can trigger a violent protest.

The government has already decided to re-impose curfew after a day of hiatus and now officials are waiting anxiously to know the family’s plan to bury this teenager. Fida had been at the fore front of several protests. Tonight dozens of his teenager friends, assembled from across the downtown city, are seething with anger. Afuneral procession in the day meant trouble so the streets are emptied off police and security men way ahead of time to avoid confrontation. The police officers are encouraging the family to conduct the burial in the dark ofida nabif the night. The local police officer sends a message too. The orders have come from the top and pleas were followed by threats - we won’t allow more than 15 people to accompany the body after the sun rise.

The elders don’t discuss the proposals of the police. They consult each other in whispers. The anger has spilled over the streets and with each passing moment more boys are arriving. There is something very common among Fida’s friends – their eyes are moist, wails hoarse and each one of them carries a large piece of green or black cloth mask covering their heads. For a moment, they act adult and shout political slogans. Then the pain of losing a dear friend reaches its threshold and they cry like little boys. Few are accompanied by mothers too. During this latest wave of mass protests here, teenagers have formed the forward lines of the Azadi groundswell as if the baton of the struggle has been silently handed over to them.The police and CRPF often open fire and they take bullets as well – in chest, neck and head. This real threat of death, however, has not deterred them to come out on the streets.

It is clear that the children born during and after the first uprising of 1990 have finally come of age.

“We have seen, heard and felt this war from the time we came to our senses. There are hardly any happy memories.’’ Fida’s friend Nisar (name changed on request) says.

" I have seen the first funeral while I was in my mother’s lap. My mother had to carry me along when I was just eighteen days old. Her cousin had been killed and she couldn’t bear to stay home. Of course I don’t remember it but my mom has repeated even the minutest details of it so many times that it has become an essential part of our family lore’’. He says Fida is his second friend to die in CRPF firing in a week’s time.

Fida’s story is tragic and it has in a way come to symbolise the tale of an entire generation, born in the conflict, during these protests. I dig a bit deeper to know Fida and the picture that emerged fits any regular teenager. He loved trendy clothes, wore a ring for good luck and carried a friendship band around his wrest.

In a photograph clicked by his older brother Aabid recently, he stands as if a model is posing to promote a jeans line. His jet black hair is cropped in style and it seems he has purposely let a few curls touch his left eye brow. He is wearing a golden colour necklace and his white shirt is spotless. But what caught my eye is his casual gaze. Like any 17-year-old, he tried to look hip. "He would never take his necklace off. It was a gift, perhaps,’’ recalls Aabid.

"He was more of a friend than a younger brother to me’’. Aabid says he had recently started wearing a Kuffiyeh – the Arab style scarves that became a statement of resistance after Yasir Arafat popularized it.

"He had seen a friend wearing it and got one too. He loved to do things that would make him stand out,’’ Aabid says. He says he saw him change recently.

"Ever since these protests started, he was restless and angry,’’ Aabid says. "I think he was very sensitive. Whenever a soldier or a policeman would stop us to show our identity cards or frisk us, he would feel angry. He thought they always look (forces) for a chance to humiliate us’’.

On August, 3, Fida had been at home in Usman Abad, a residential colony that has recently come up in the marshy paddy fields in the city outskirts. Eight months ago, his family had shifted from Nawabazar - a congested neighbourhood in politically volatile downtown. The construction of the house was yet to complete but Fida’s parents decided to move in anyway.

They wanted to take their three sons, particularly Fida, away from the downtown. Fida had quit school soon after he had passed the matric examination. Worried, his father Ghulam Nabi – who works as a salesman at a shop - had made him promise to appear in class 11 examination as a private student. He had also given him money to buy second hand clothes and helped him to put a cart in the Sunday Market along the residency road.

Aabid says Fida liked this new arrangement. He would work on Sundays and have all week free for fun. But he couldn’t carry on for too long. Again his father intervened and this time helped him (Fida) to find a salesman’s job at an acquaintance’s shop. "He was working at Sana garments in Safakadal these days,’’ Aabid says.

Once the current wave of protests started, Fida became restless.

"The shop is in the middle of the downtown city. He knew several among the boys who were protesting. His friends had been injured too while protesting. Many of them had been arrested bythe police,’’ Aabid recalls.

"He was there when Tufail (On June, 11, Tufail Ahmad Mattoo (17) who was killed when a policeman fired a plastic pellet straight on his head, killing him instantaneously and triggering this latest wave of protests) was buried’’. The garment shop was shut because of the unrest, but every day Fida would leave home to join his friends in downtown.

"He never wanted to come to this new house. He would tell us that each time he comes to this new house, he feels he has left his heart in those narrow lanes of the old city. He was a boyfrom the old city’’.

Fida seemed to have loved the congestion and mess of the old city - an affection that was not one sided.

That day, he had been playing carrom with his younger brother and few visiting friends at the family’s new house.

"He didn’t like it here in Usman Abad but once we shifted here, he had made few friends in the neighbourhood,’’ Aabid says.

The government had clamped a strict curfew over the city but there were reports that boys were defying it everywhere. Fida had been talking to his friends on phone. His brother Aabid had not come home for a week ever since he had gone to cover protests in Baramulla because of the curfew. Aabid takes pictures for a local newspaper. "I had called home in the morning. He didn’t let me talk to mom properly and snatched the phone from her. He wanted to talk to me. He sounded cheerful,’’ Aabid recalls. "He wanted me to come home. I was insisting even as I told him there is curfew. When I recall that conversation, I feel perhaps he had a premonition ’’.

His mother Zahida Nabi had pleaded with him not to step out. "I won’t let you go out today. It’s scary out there,’’ Zahida recalls.

So he stayed home. At 6.30 in the evening, a large procession had assembled on the main road. Fida heard the sounds of the slogans and couldn’t stop himself. He stepped out, escaping the eye of his mother. The procession was going towards the city. By the time his mother Zahida knew, he had run to join the protest. A large contingent of police and CRPF had already arrived to prevent the protestors to enter the city at Shaltang junction.

"I saw him standing near the parapet. I was about to call him and suddenly there was firing. I saw him holding his face with his hands and then he fell down,’’ Fida’s uncle Mohammad Amin recalls. "A bullet fired by a CRPF men ricocheted off a rock and pierced through his cheek. He was lying there. There was chaos all around and I couldn’t go closer’’. Finally, Fida was picked up and rushed to hospital.

For five days, his mother waited patiently in the corridor outside the Intensive Care ward of Sher-e-Kashmir Institute of Medical Sciences, occasionally slipping in to see him breathe. At 10.15 pm on Sunday, Fida died. The doctor pulled the sheet over his head and walked away silently. "He’s alive,’’ Zahida Nabi screamed, putting her ear close to his chest to hear that little sound of life. Then she pulled her hair and tried to suckle him as if he was a baby. " Wake up my son– wake up – just once. I promise I will never scold you again,’’ she shouted, pleading with her dead son as if to break his sleep.

The family and friends too were around and they rushed to arrange an ambulance to Fida home. "I didn’t know what to do. So I started calling friends,’’ Aabid recalls. "He died. Can you imagine? He is only 17. Have you seen his pictures? He was a handsome boy,’’ Aabid says and breaks down.

"I just wish I had been with him. I want to see him one time the way he used to be. The bullet had disfigured his face. I want to see him smile. Oh God. Why did this happen?’’

Every human being has a measure of protection against pain. I feel I have reached my threshold. For years, I have witnessed blood and gore and felt numb but Aabid’s words pierce through my protective shell. The wails suddenly feel like sharp daggers, slicing through my heart. I didn’t know how to respond and walk away slowly. A few yards ahead, a group of boys are sitting silently in a dark corner. I join them. Their attire suggests they are all Fida’s friends. I am unable to see their faces and gauge the mood. But I start anyway and begin with small talk. They are forthcoming. Perhaps they have seen me talk to Aabid which gives them the confidence. These boys generally avoid talking to reporters. In fact, they detest media and are convinced that their story is always distorted. Did he throw stones? I ask. "Yes but only when the police and CRPF stopped the procession. I do too,’’ his friend, who didn’t give his name, says. "We want Azadi. We shout protest and shout slogans. The police and CRPF don’t like it. They try to catch us and we throw stones’’. He says Fida is a martyr. "His blood won’t go waste,’’ he insists. His voice is hoarse – perhaps he has been shouting slogans for days. I didn’t ask. Although the boys are polite, I can feel the anger.

A few yards ahead, an elderly man tries to convince a large group of angry teenagers to let them bury him (Fida) in the local graveyard. It is evident that the elders feel the situation can go out of control. "They (police and CRPF) won’t allow us even to reach the main road during the day. They won’t let us go all the way to Nawabazar and then to Shaheed Mazar (Eidgah) to bury him. They are saying only 15 people can accompany his body,’’ an elder tells the boys. The teenagers are angry and are in no mood to budge. Their plan is to take the body to Nawabazar in downtown, wait for the sunrise and then take out a funeral procession to the neighbouring Eidgah where they want to bury him in `Behishtay Shohdaye Kashmir’. This graveyard is the biggest in the valley and was exclusively set up for all those men and women who were killed by security men during the last two decades. Hundreds of militants too are buried there.

There is chaos and a few elderly women too pitch in to convince the boys. At one point, the teenagers give in. The elders organize Jinaza, the funeral prayer, in a hurry and the body is taken towards the local graveyard in neighbouring Parimpora. On their way, the boys change their mind and place the stretcher carrying Fida’s body on the Srinagar-Baramulla highway. Minutes ago, an army convoy had passed through and the elders apprehend a clash. After a lot of pleading, the boys agree to bring the body back home.

Fida’s body is placed in the middle of a tent, erected in an empty plot of land, especially for the mourners. Dozens of women encircle it. Soon Fida’s mother Zahida Nabi brings henna to paint the little finger of his left hand – a local custom to prepare a groom before he leaves to the bride’s home. "He is a groom. He is a groom,’’ Zahida repeats. The crowd gets hysterical. And as the blanket is lifted off his face for a final glimpse, a few women shower almonds and sweets on his body. Fida’s mother starts singing dirges in Kashmiri.

"Don’t die so soon my son– your nails are still wet with henna - Oh my friend – Oh my beloved son – won’t you miss me,’’ she sang as everyone repeated.

"Oh my martyr – Oh my martyr, are you thirsty – are you thirsty’’. Soon Fida’s teenager friends start shouting Azadi slogans. Zahida starts franticly hugging Fida’s body. There is a girl, holding Fida’s feet and crying silently. Hours later Aabid tells me, Fida was seeing her. "She is devastated. They have had a little fight that morning and she wouldn’t take his calls,’’ he says. "Now she will never get a chance to talk to him (Fida) again’’.

The police had been consistently sending messages asking not to delay the burial till the morning. Sensing the tension, a group of elders finally yield to the pressure of the boys and decide to quickly arrange for a truck to take the body to Nawabazar. "They won’t let us bury him here. So let’s see what happens once we reach Nawabazar,’’ an elder says. At around 3 am, the funeral procession finally leaves. The city is dark and empty – the security men have retreated to their sand bunkers and camps. The elders, however, don’t take chances and guide the truck through narrow lanes to avoid security bunkers. "We don’t want to even take a slight risk. We are avoiding to pass by any security bunker,’’ says Masood Ahmad, a businessman and a neighbor of the family. "The boys are shouting slogans and if they (security men) react angrily, there will be a massacre’’.

In Nawabazar, the boys jump off the truck and quickly make an announcement over the mosque loudspeaker. A CRPF man walks out slowly to check but returns to his bunker immediately. Soon the residents start waking up and come out in dozens, rubbing their eyes. Another funeral prayer is organized – this time right in the chowk. The security men watch from the pigeon holes of their bunker but don’t venture out. Perhaps, there are orders not to confront the people tonight.

The residents remember him and his four childhood friends, playing cricket in the inner lane on every strike day. Waseem, Bari, Suhail and Basit are all accompanying their bosom friend for his last journey.

"We have met and become friends here. We wanted to bring him here one last time,’’ Waseem explains.

"It means a lot to us. If anyone among was there in his place, he would have done the same’’.

Fida was born here. When he died, every family in Nawabazar wept for him. Even the children have come out in the dead of the night to bid him a final goodbye. "We have carried you in our laps – we have loved you – you were our boy with beautiful eyes – how can you leave us,’’ women wail as they stand in semi circles around the stretcher that carries his body. Fida is a son of a thousand mothers here. Though his father Ghulam Nabi was from Sopore, he had married in Nawabazar and soon left his ancestral home to live in a rented house, near his in-laws.

The boys pick up the stretcher again. Their plan is to keep the body inside the mosque and wait. A local cleric, however, intervenes and pacifies them. Finally, a procession moves towards the Eidgah graveyard.

At 5 am, Fida is buried next to his friend Anees who was killed last week. "He (Fida) had come and helped dig the grave and carry mounds of earth,’’ his friend Waseem recalls. "We didn’t know, he is the next’’.

It is already dawn. The sky over Srinagar is overcast. Within an hour, the soldiers will be again on the streets to impose curfew.

PS: Fida’s friends tried to organize a blood donation camp at his house in Usman Abad neighbourhood but the police didn’t allow the officials of the Blood Bank from SMHS hospital to come.

Courtesy:Muzammil Jaleel for The Indian Express